365 days and 2 feathers


February 11th at 03:00 am I woke in a state of panic. Unable to catch my breath.  I realized that this date marked one year since my grandfather passed. One year ago on this date, my whole world went silent.   My Opa was a man who was my biggest fan and my very best friend.  I knew every day just how much I was loved. Since my Opas passing my mind constantly races and my world seems quiet. You are missed so much. This year has been a hard year for me. This year has reminded me I need to live my life. Make my life as comfortable as possible as he would always tell me.

This February 11th there was a psychic fair close to where Gran lives, so we decided what a great way to move forward into the next year and see if we couldn’t both get messages.

When I awoke at 03:00 AM I had a vision of the lady who I would go to for my reading. I envisioned that she was in a corner booth and she had short light colored hair. Oddly enough there was just the person to fit this description but Gran was interested in her as well. Gran knew a bit about her but I knew nothing I just knew she was a medium and I believed she held the message I needed to move forward to make this my year. To stop being sad. I felt drawn to her.

We did a lap of the room and Gran decided on a different person to do her reading.  I happily ran back across the room and took the last available spot on the list of the short-haired woman in the corner booth. I had to wait about an hour to meet with this lady and I was starting to become overwhelmed with feelings of nervousness. I almost went to a medium last year on my grandpa’s birthday but I felt I wasn’t ready. I was worried Opa wouldn’t come across. I was scared to be disappointed. Gran and I laughed before our appointments thinking how crazy Opa would have thought spending our money to talk to those who have passed would be.

I watched as Gran’s reading started it looked like it was going well, I saw her fae light up with a smile but then the tears hit and I knew she was getting the message she needed. Just before my appointment, I moved across the room to sit close and watch my medium lady finish up her reading with the lady before me. Gran touched me on the shoulder and said she just finished and of course, he came through. I was so happy to hear he was near but nervous as it was my time. Would this lady do my reading justice? I was about to find out.

I sat down at this little table nicely decorated with a purple glitter tablecloth. I smiled as purple is my favourite colour and I love me some sparkle. The lady asked me why I was there and I simply said to hear what she had to tell me. I wasn’t trying to be difficult I just wasn’t sure what would come up. I think my nerves had taken over.

I had a special rock in my purse from an aunt who had passed. She let me know she knew about the rock but I would only be connecting with one person. My Opa showed up and took over the reading. She did touch on my relationship and jobs which I found interesting and pretty accurate. The amount of detail she used to describe my grandfather blew me away.  She knew this date was special to me and she told me what signs to look for and that he will forever be around and even though he is gone he is never far.

She was kind enough at the end of the reading to write out a list of things to work on and so this year I do want to make some changes and live a simpler kinder life. I celebrated my Opas passing this year  with happiness of knowing he is near and although he might not show up with flowers and an infectious smile that I miss. I am glad he will always be beside me to help guide me through this life.



Take me to the wall!

Take me to the wall!

Hello February, I am hoping that the groundhog who predicted early spring is correct. I am ready!

I started my spring cleaning early. If you ever come to my house and it’s spotless I was stress cleaning. This kind of cleaning takes it to a whole new level. When my baseboards have been cleaned you know there is trouble. This is exactly what happened to me recently. I did something I have not done in 2023. I braved the dreaded weight scale.  I sat shocked at the number that came up. Is this thing set right? This is the most I have ever weighed in my life and while my BMI is still normal I am not feeling it. I have had difficulty remaining motivated to work out in these long cold months. I feel more like a bear. You can find me hibernating, call me spring hits.

When I saw that number come up on the scale I knew I had to change a few things again in my life and get back on track. I am not beating myself up that that number even though it almost gave me a heart attack. I am not allowing that number to control me but rather reminding myself that I stress ate a lot last year! It was one heck of year. I changed everything about my life and I lost my best friend. I am going to now turn the stress I feel into power to shred these pounds.

My weakness in life will always be sweets. I would die before I gave up eating cake. I am hoping to learn better portions and not fit the whole cake in my mouth. Minus my birthday that will forever be a day filled with bad choices and enough cake to kill me. It’s my day! I will live my best day or month!

At last, I found myself searching for a new workout routine. Trying to find something to spark my interest and get me motivated. I am always trying to outrun myself. I feel accomplished when I set new goals. I am happy to report after recovering from an injury I am back on the bike. Nothing kills my restless legs as biking until I cannot get off the Pelton. Pelton leader board keeps me going. I got close to the top and rode into the top 3 but I need a number 1 ride. I am coming for you.

I will forever include yoga and meditation in my life I need those to remain clam, collected and calm. I however was searching for something full body strength as I do need to work on my over all strength. That is when I found an interesting video on wall pilaties. It was going so good I was feeling the body burn with the video I was following. Then this lady took wall climbers up on the wall in 2 different ways. I had myself questioning my sanity. I do not enjoy mountain climbers on the ground level. What have I gotten myself into? I cannot raise my arms over my head and legit every piece of me hurts. I think my found my ass kicking get in shape work out. I am almost a week into it and starting to see results already. Fit in Feburary game on! 28 days of work out and 28 days in Feburary how fitting.

This is just the motivation I need as I get ready to tackle this month on. I am transitioning to an new job and popping in for a few shifts at an old job. I am planning some trips and looking forward to reconnecting and traveling to a provience I had not visited to spent time with someone who was a huge part of my life. Over the years we lost contact but because of social media we found each other and in March the fun begins. Birthday month I am going all out.

I am buying concert tickets and going outside my comfort zone with new styles of music. I am embracing saying yes to any adventure I am offered. I vowed to make 2023 the best year yet. A wise old senior once told me to make this life as comfortable as possible. In the almost 40 years we shared we saw alot of beautiful sights. I am vowing to be a healier, kinder more adventurous version of myself. I vow to always try the cake and work hard to keep myself strong and ready to take on whatever comes next.