Brick by brick I built tall walls

The biggest lesson I learned during my journey of self-discovery was that I built some tall walls around myself to protect my feelings. I was scared to show others how I felt. I have felt embarrassed about where my life has been. Clearly my life hasn’t gone as I had planned.

I only wanted people to see the good and successful parts of my life. The parts that looked like they were all rainbows and sunshine. The success and happiness. Only at the time, I didn’t have any of that. I didn’t want others to see the stormy parts. The failures that caused doom and gloom. Then I couldn’t see the good parts that failing brought me. Embrace failure. Failing has brought some of the greatest opportunities into my life. Failure isn’t the end it’s just the beginning of the journey. If you fail get back up and try it again, try it differently, or try something completely different.

Life is what you make it. You are always capable of change. You are never too old, too broke, or too damaged to make a change.  Just like adding a brick to the wall, you are also capable of removing a brick. I didn’t build tall walls in a day. Every failure I added on another brick. Every time someone was unkind to me I added on another brick. What I didn’t do was remove a brick every time I succeeded or every time someone was kind to me. In my darkness, I just kept piling bricks until my walls were taller than me. Those were some tall walls.  My walls were so tall my whole world became black. Walls so tall I could no longer see a way out. Walls so tall I could not allow anyone in. I stayed distant, alone, and stuck in my own darkness. Let me tell you the wall of darkness lead me to complete sadness mixed with depression.

When I could no longer cope with my tall walls I started to analyze how each brick came to be a part of my wall and my life? What did I have to do in order to remove the brick? I wanted to smash these bricks for good. I didn’t want to tear my walls down only to find myself putting each brick back up on the wall. That is an exhausting process.  As much as I would love to tell you I took a wrecking ball to my walls and smashed all my problems away. I didn’t. I think a lot of us want a quick fix but few of us are willing to put in the hard work. It has taken me years to remove my bricks and destroy my walls.

I spent years discovering my failures, looking over my wrongdoings, my unrealistic expectations of others. I had to accept that I am not in charge of the world. I had to learn how to stand up for myself. I had to review the people in my life and figure out if they had a positive or negative effect. Removing bricks and letting people know the real me feels amazing because I know I am being true to myself. I am sharing my story from darkness to light to inspire others to share in their struggles.  You are not alone. Everyone has walls. What’s holding your wall up? What thoughts and expectations do you need to destroy? I want to help you live a life free from feeling trapped inside tall walls. Let’s knock em down brick by brick you can do it!

Puppy yoga it’s a thing!

Two things I love in life are practicing yoga and enjoying puppy cuddles. I  love basking in all the silliness-happiness that puppies bring.

I didn’t know puppy yoga was a thing but I am sure glad I had the opportunity to experience it. Not only did I get to partake in this yoga event but the puppies that came were corgis. Corgi puppies are my weakness. They are too cute for words. I couldn’t sleep the night before I was beyond excited. I printed my ticket and I was ready to go. Take my money! Start the car!

The yoga class was held at Whozagooddog canine enrichment center. If you have a dog you need to check out this place. It has everything your dog could ever dream of! Great place to tire your dog out in many of the activity rooms, fitness, training,  grab a treat, or even some raw dog food,  and they have full grooming services. Your dog will leave looking top-notch show-worthy! This is the location where Kingston Ontario corgis have hosted corgi parties!. We hope we can do this again soon. All of the cool dogs go to Whozagooddog. Being a part of this dog community has brought so many great dog people into my life. I love following Whozagooddog on Facebook and Instagram because they post pictures every day of the happy dogs attending doggie daycare. If you don’t follow them I suggest you do its an instant mood booster. You won’t be able to stop smiling at all the cute dogs.  Thank you Whoozagooddog for all you do keep up the amazing work! Can’t wait to see you again soon.

The eleven puppies that came to puppy yoga were from Edgebrook Kennels. If you are considering a Cardigan corgi I would highly recommend checking out this kennel.

As I sat on my yoga mat listening to our lovely instructor telling us what puppy yoga would be like I couldn’t help but feel the positive energy flowing. Everyone was sitting on their yoga mats with huge smiles anxiously awaiting the puppies. Then as the class started and we all began to hold our first yoga pose the puppies came running down the hall and burst into the room. They made their grand entrance memorable. Eight-week-old corgi puppies you can’t resist those little fluffy butts. The whole room let out an “aw” as the puppies quickly ran around filling the room with laughter. I don’t know that I ever held a full yoga pose. I would start a pose and then a new puppy would come to say hello. I can’t resist those cute puppies I had to snuggle them all. At the beginning of the class, the puppies were so full of energy and by the end, we had a huge pile of sleeping cuties. They put on a lot of kilometers on those little legs making the rounds to meet everyone. My heart is still so full from this event. Thank you for having me and I look forward to doing this again.

Ring Bling!

My love of rings started when I was a young girl. I loved to go through my mom’s jewelry box and try on all her jewels.

A moment that I will always remember and cherish from my childhood was the day my mom took me to the jewelry store. It was a  local store on the main street of the little town I grew up in. She took me to get my very first gold ring. I felt like royalty.  The ring I picked out was a yellow gold ring with my birthstone aquamarine. It was simple yet it was the most gorgeous ring I had ever seen. I wore that ring every day up until college when it went missing/ was stolen.  I was devastated. I have spent years searching for a ring like it. I know a replacement ring could never replace the feeling that the original ring gave me but I always keep an eye out.

Now as an adult I wear three yellow gold rings on my right ring finger. These rings have been passed down to me from my family. These rings mean the world to me. These rings remind me how loved I am.

The ring closest to me was given o me when my grandma Davis (my dad’s mom) when she passed away I inherited it. It is a solid yellow gold wedding band. It was a ring given to her by her husband for their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary.  It is a ring that carries such loving memories. It is a part of our family history. I feel honoured to wear it.  When I look down at the ring it reminds me that lasting love is possible. Thanks, grandparents your love lives on through this ring.

The middle ring makes me smile and remember my time spent on Vancouver Island. It reminds me I am braver than I know and stronger than I think. I ended up on Vancouver Island as a runaway bride. After close to a year I had pawned my engagement rings to catch a flight back to Ontario. It came to the exact amount I needed, I took that as a sign. My west coast dreams didn’t work out as I had planned. I felt like it failed yet again in life. However, I forged forward and what came next from coming home forever change my life in the best way possible I got my son.  My middle ring was given to me by my cousin Noah. The ring is yellow gold with a few diamonds. When I was leaving the island she wrote me a letter that made me cry and she surprised me with this ring. She said, “No woman should be without a diamond.” I love this cousin of mine far beyond what words can describe. We live thousands of miles apart yet we live very similar lives. You have such a beautiful heart. I am so glad you are a Davis. I’m so lucky to have you as my family. Thanks, cousin I miss you tons and I love you lots. I think of you daily when I look down at this ring.

The ring on the outside is such a unique ring, I fell in love with this ring the first time I found it in my mother’s jewelry box. It is my parent’s wedding ring. The ring is a yellow gold band with partly melted-down gold nuggets. My parents got married in the Yukon. A place I dream to see. Even though they have been divorced for many years I love this ring. Without the Yukon wedding, I might not exist. Thanks for passing down this ring, I am thankful I still have you both here. Every day I see your ring and it makes me smile.

These three rings stacked together make my heart so full of love. Everyone should have some ring bling it’s a wonderful feeling knowing all these rings were worn by the family before me and will be passed down to family after me.