Good Riddance

“Good riddance to the past and all my bad decisions”.

This song lyric hit me hard recently. I am not even sure how I came to listen to this song as it is not my type of music, but that lyric stopped me and made me think. I heard it on a grueling day when I had to decide I hope I made the right decision. One decision can change your whole life. Is it for the best? Did I do the right thing?

One decision I made still haunts me and causes me to lose sleep. I hope I made the best decision as it not only affects me. No way to know if I made the right decision only time will tell.

Have you ever heard a song you needed at that moment, and you come to play it over and over? Today I needed to hear this lyric over and over and I sat staring at a message that ate at me. Why is this happening to me today?

The pissed-off version of me wanted to shoot back my real anger at this situation. I learned a long time ago I need to walk away and take time. I never want to say something I do not mean out of anger. I never want someone to overthink my angry words. You can’t take back what you sat in anger. I do not want to be an angry person.  I try to remain positive in every situation.

I learned I have a temper and I need to step away and calm down. The angry version of me is unkind. The calm version of me is kind. I will no longer allow others to make me feel this level of upset or anger. It is my choice who I allow in my life. I wake up every day with a full heart and nothing but gratitude for the amazing people surrounding me.

I am not a fan of social media and never have been I wouldn’t have social media if I didn’t have a special BC cousin who convinced me we should stay connected. I would do anything for my family, and as my family  circle gets smaller, I will do everything I can to stay in touch. Family means everything to me.  I am thankful for social media in many ways as it keeps me connected to family and friends from afar to whom I wish I could be closer. I have reconnected with people I am so glad to hear from, sought out some of my favourite people, and had amazing conversations that we wouldn’t have gotten to have without social media, making it so easy and always at our fingertips.

Scary to think anyone is one just one click away. You have the ability to search for anyone or anything. I have a love dislike relationship with this. I struggle with social media and the amount of time I can waste looking at cute dog videos on Instagram. I have always tried my best to keep my son’s presence offline. I try to share all the important updates with family, but I have sheltered my information about my boy as best as I can. No judgement to those who post kiddos I love following all the moments I am cheering you on from the sidelines. I am always down for baby snuggles!

Recently I realized more than ever how precious our limited time is and I make the choice of who is allowed in my life. I will not allow myself to be upset by a message from someone who upsets me and brings nothing into my life. I get to make the decision. Silence is a decision. I do not have time or energy to waste on anything or anyone who doesn’t bring me positivity, light and love.

2023 Good riddance to my past and all my bad decisions. Nothing but good vibes moving forward. I am open to new adventures and opportunities coming my way!

 

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