Change is all around us. Life is forever changing and testing us in every way possible. Sometimes we choose to make a change and sometimes without warning life hands us a change. Every change in life is an experience that can be taken in many different directions, depending on how you deal with the given change.
Sometimes change is the greatest gift. Sometimes change sends us off in a direction we never dreamed. Sometimes change leaves us in a puddle of tears. Sometime changes test us on our patience, strength or determination. Sometimes change leaves us smiling. Sometime change leaves us wondering why.
Change tests our reactions. I used to only know how to react quickly and negatively. I was the “yeller”, the fighter, the “always have to be right” kinda gal. Truth is when I was in my darkest state I used to become paralyzed with fear over even a slight change in my life. When something or someone changed, I thought I had to fight it. I became a dramatic mess because I couldn’t cope with change. I viewed changing as the scariest thing to happen in life. I lived in a tiny bubble of comfort and I never wanted to change. I liked to be the fighting victim in a sad story. A sad story I wrote. A sad story I didn’t know how to change into a positive one. I thought this is my story and this is it. But, it is never too late to change your story.
Sucked into negativity and hate I was honestly just terrified to change. I wasn’t able to view change in the amazing positive way I can now. I view change as a positive growth. My life is forever changing and I think at how grateful I am to have experience it all. I am grateful to have survived and to be enjoying every single day I am given. I now look forward to the changes coming in my life. I now feel that even the changes that aren’t going the way I planned are a great learning platform. Changes have taught me to slow down and think. Sometimes I have to think outside of the box and get creative. Sometimes I have to think outside my comfort zone for a way to make this change work. Change is now a great opportunity to network, to meet new people, to work together, to embrace and enjoy life. Change is always around us. Figure out the best way to tackle and make this change work.
My whole world suddenly changed when I almost died. I almost died at the hands of someone who promised to love me forever and left me for dead. I almost died at the hands of myself because I couldn’t cope with my repetitive negative thoughts. I almost died because I felt like no one would save me. I almost died before I realized the only person who could save me was me. I had to rise up. I had to get up. I had to show up. I had to fight for the change I wanted in my life. I had to believe in myself. I had to fight for myself. I had to make my life what I wanted. Would it have been easier to be the sad victim in my own story? Absolutely! Did I enjoy always being sad and missing out on life? I thought I did when I was in my darkest places I couldn’t imagine seeing my life any other way. The only thing I could see was death. Then it started with the “what ifs” creeping in and haunting me. I was ready to end this game of life.
You never know what life is going to hand you in the change department. Not every change can be a positive one. We must remember to deal with change slowly, make a plan and remind ourselves that we are doing our best. “Do your best and if your best isn’t good enough fuck it”. Not everyone would agree with all the changes I have made. I embrace other people’s opinions, feedback and comments both positive and negative but at the end of the day it’s my life and I am going to live it my way.
I have hopes and dreams. I am thankful for each day given to me. I try to make a positive glimmer of hope in someone’s day every day. I try to live with kindness in mind. I do the best I can and I just enjoy each day. Remember you are never to (whatever you are thinking) old, broke, worthless, ugly to make a change. I wish I would have had a life coach to help me make my biggest changes. It was a much longer road to do it myself. It was not an easy journey. I think it would have been awesome to have someone cheering me on and keeping me accountable to my goals. I think my journey would have been a lot more fun. More tears of laughter than sorrow. I want to be that cheer leader for you if you are feeling stuck. I want to motivate, inspire and get you to kick ass in this life too.
From tasting death to changing into the amazing person I am. I am here to say you can too. I believe in you! I am cheering you on. You got this. If I did it you can to. I am always here via email, text and phone.
I always like to end my blogs by being thankful. I like to remind myself and everyone else that we have a lot to be thankful for. I am thankful to be alive. I am thankful that I kept fighting. I am thankful to experience each and every day with and open heart and a wise mind.